Mommy stress and baby blues

The Triumphant Mom - 04 March, 2010

For both you and your partner, when baby makes three, life gets a lot more complicated.  Even the most eagerly-awaited newborn tends to have quite an unsettling impact.  Just when you think the worst is over— no more morning sickness; no more feeling like a beached whale; no more lying awake at night, worrying about childbirth, while junior keeps kicking you in the ribs— suddenly a whole new reality sets in, with its own kind of stresses.  You wake up and realize that the Hallmark card they gave you at the office was true when it said, “Congratulations!  Life as you knew it just ended.”  Even if your pregnancy was planned (which only happens about half the time), the experience of bringing home baby can be a lot like getting your dream car by having it come crashing through your roof. 

Things you can do to relax

Most first-time parents feel at least little overwhelmed by the responsibility of caring for their tiny, demanding bundle of joy.  They quickly discover that unlike a new car, a new baby doesn’t come with an owner’s manual.  Here are some tips to help you relax and enjoy the ride.

• Clear your calendar of social obligations; let the world manage without you for just a little while.
• Lower your expectations about housework.  It will always be there.
• In fact, lower your expectations across the board.  Try not to judge yourself according to your previous standards of productivity.  For now, your job should be simply to care for and enjoy your newborn.
• If friends or relatives offer to bring meals or run errands, let them help.  You can return the favor later.
• Don’t be afraid to ask Daddy to help with diaper changes, baby baths, and household chores.  After all, it took both of you to get to this point.  If Daddy is unavailable, try to find someone willing to assist you.  Even supermommies need a hand.
• Turn on the baby monitor and take a long, hot shower.  If your baby interrupts, try again tomorrow.
• Play your favorite lullabies, or any soft, soothing music.  The rhythms found in waltzes and ballads are especially good for restoring peace of mind.
• Sing to your baby.  Your newborn is not Simon from American Idol!  
• Use a rocking chair, with or without your baby.  The rocking motion stimulates your brain to produce a natural calming effect.
• Take your baby out for a stroll.  Try to get some fresh air and sunshine every day that weather permits.
• Count your blessings.
• Smile.  You can’t furrow your brow and smile at the same time; besides, which one do you want to leave its mark on your face as you age? 
• Find something to laugh about.  As the ancient Hebrew saying goes, “A cheerful heart is good medicine.”  (Proverbs 17:22a)1
• Remember that this, too, shall pass.

By Dr Karen Struble co-author of Caring for your newborn: How to enjoy the first 60 days as a new mom.

What are your 'mommy relax time' tips to share with new moms?

End Notes

1 Holy Bible, New Revised Standard Version, 1990.

Image: 

Your Comments

Sign up first to receive notification when new comments are posted.